Wednesday, April 06, 2005 :::

guess I'm still full of surprises....
 

I feel like vomiting.
or crying.
or both.

I'm not sure what I'm trying to protect myself from.
or why I'm so certain I need protection.

I've got this awful feeling in my stomach... kinda like I get when I've had ~way~ too much to drink.
I'm not sure why I'm taking this so personally.
he's just some guy, right?

this isn't exactly the best time for me, either.
I've got no internet connection (at home), no phone (prepaids don't count as real phones) and nothing to do (no school atm).

he's just a kid trying to make a life for himself.
he's building a future.

I'm... not.
I'm wasting away biding my time... just waiting for my lease to be up.
and then what?

like I told him, guess I should've asked for terms.
I'm not sure why I'm so hurt, though.
I feel like I've been kicked in the gut.
think I'm gonna sit in the tub for a while when I get home - I've gotta think about why this is bothering me so much.

::: posted by tinafish at 9:46 PM :::